Cultural Revolutions

Burning Fries in Hell

Ronald McDonald had better look into renting Osama bin Laden’s Pakistani hideout.  Several national newspapers recently published a letter, signed by over 1,000 health professionals and two-dozen institutions such as the Chicago Hispanic Health Coalition and the Inpatient Diabetes Program at Boston University, imploring McDonald’s CEO Jim Skinner to “stop marketing junk food to children.”  In case he didn’t already know it, the signatories informed Skinner that “children suffering from conditions related to the food they eat” have swamped healthcare facilities.  If the awful eating habits of American youth persist, today’s children will likely be “the first in U.S. history” whose lives will be shorter than their parents’.

And how exactly is McDonald’s causing this national health crisis that, left unchecked, will prematurely kill off our youth?  Advertising, of course.  To be certain, McDonald’s has long polluted the planet’s airwaves with its moronic propaganda.  The blight caused by the ubiquitous golden arches atop the revolting architecture of its “restaurants” has arguably defaced the American landscape worse than the fat and sodium it passes off as food have damaged America’s coronary arteries.  But the letter specifically identifies one “Ronald McDonald” as the primary culprit in the company’s...

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